It's 2am on a school night, and 16-year-old Zack's parents went to bed hours ago. Upstairs in his bedroom, however, Zack is still awake. In fact, he's online (where everything evil happens) chatting with his friend Jo. What devious things are they talking about so late and so far away from parental supervision? Masturbation (DUM)? Their shared fondness for leather (FOL)? When to meet up at the elite nude club for a marijuana party (Want 2 go 1337 1174 tmrw? 420!)?

Or is Zack IM-ing about how religion helped him to confront and accept his inevitable mortality? How he was lost in the vast wilderness, until the light of God shone down upon him, illuminating a path that had been there all along?

According to this ad for, yeah, that's what teens are IMing about. OMG.


Aww. Isn't it nice to know that at least someone out there still has faith in young people? (As long as they're of a very specific faith, that is.) They're not always cybersexing each other and sending naked pictures. Sometimes they're creepily proselytizing via IM about how before Mormonism they were all :(( But after Mormonism, they have all the answers and are totes ;)